Title: Travelling companion
Fandom: Torchwood
Characters: Jack, Ianto
Author: m_findlow
Rating: PG
Length: 5,994 words
Content notes: none
Author notes: Written for Challenge 466 - Relax
Summary: All Jack and Ianto wanted was a relaxing few weeks holiday.



Ianto tugged the zipper on his case with a flourish. ‘Right, that's everything,’ he declared, having tossed in his toiletries as the final item now that he'd used them. ‘I don't know about you,’ he said, carrying on the conversation as he double checked the address tags on his suitcase, ‘but I'm looking forward to a few weeks of nothing but sunshine.’

Jack quirked an eyebrow at him. ‘I thought you were a proud Welshman?’

‘And we love nothing more than to moan about the weather. There's only so much rain and grey skies a person can take. That's why Cardiff has direct flights to Majorca. We all need to escape sometimes.’

‘Lucky we're not going to Majorca then,’ Jack teased. ‘I'm trying to have a break from all these miserable Welshmen.’

‘All excepting one I should hope.’

‘Of course. So, you're all packed?’ Jack checked his watch. ‘An hour early I should add. The taxi isn't due until half eight.’

‘It's not me that's organised. It's making sure I allow time for you.’

‘Me?’

Ianto looked him up and down. ‘You're not going dressed like that are you?’ he asked, referring to Jack standing there dressed in his usual attire – blue shirt, grey slacks and his greatcoat. It was cool outside and Jack's coat would be perfect to keep off the chill but that was temporary.

Jack frowned down at himself. ‘What's wrong with this?’

Ianto rolled his eyes, wondering why he asked rhetorical questions to someone so intellectually aloof. ‘We’re holidaying on a tropical archipelago. It'll be warm and sunny.’

‘I know.,’ Jack replied. ‘I like warm. And sunny,’ he added. ‘I grew up on a desert world by the beach, remember?’

‘You packed other clothes though, didn’t you?’ Ianto moved over to Jack's suitcase and unzipped it to inspect the contents for himself. He pawed through them, his disbelief growing more and more profound. ‘Jack, there's no holiday clothes in here.’

‘Nonsense. I packed swimming togs. And my sunglasses. Hoping though that there’s a remote island beach somewhere where we won’t be needing either,’ he added with a wink.

‘And a host of shirts and trousers exactly like the ones you're wearing now,’ Ianto said, resisting the urge to pull them out to show him, knowing it’d be his job to re-iron them if they became unfolded.

‘You can talk! You’re wearing chinos and a shirt,’ Jack replied. ‘Not to mention a jacket.’

‘A short sleeved shirt,’ Ianto clarified, ‘and this is only for the flight. You know how cold those aircraft are. Once we're there, I can switch my chinos for shorts.’ His whole case was full of coordinating shorts and t-shirts, with some nicer linen shirts for night time dinners out somewhere a bit fancy, and only one spare jacket just in case they hit some milder weather.’ He huffed, pulling the entire folded contents of Jack's suitcase out in one large armful and dumping them on the bed. ‘I'm repacking your stuff,’ he declared. ‘It's not like you don't own any other clothes. This is exactly why I allow extra time.’

Jack sighed. ‘You're supposed to be relaxing. Not working yourself up.’

‘I'll feel relaxed when I know you're properly packed for a beach holiday. Honestly, it's like you try to stress me out.’

‘Not intentionally.’

Ianto raised an eyebrow at him. ‘Are you sure about that?’

Jack was dismissed from the room and Ianto succeeded in repacking Jack's luggage, bemoaning a lack of t-shirts which he was sure Jack used to have in the wardrobe and had mysteriously reduced in quantity beyond the standard white ones he usually wore under his dress shirt. Ianto vowed that they'd do a little shopping during their first few days, adding some local fashion to Jack's capsule wardrobe. There'd be loads of places selling t-shirts of a kind appropriate for hanging out by the pool or wandering around the market towns.

Once packed – properly this time – the taxi arrived and they headed for the airport and from there it was tropical island bound for a well earned break.



By the time they’d arrived, picked up their bags from the luggage carousel and hailed a taxi to take them to the hotel, Ianto was much more relaxed, happy in the knowledge what whilst Jack was still getting around in his usual attire for now, he had a full swag of more holiday appropriate clothing he could lean back on when he finally came to his senses – preferably about three minutes after they’d checked in to their suite, which is when he planned on changing himself. The weather was perfect and the palms could be seen swinging lazily in the sea breeze as the taxi swept them along with all its windows rolled down to take advantage of as much warm tropical air as possible. This was what he’d been counting down days in his calendar for. Perfect tropical paradise.

They pulled their suitcases up to the hotel reception desk and Jack immediately started flirting with the man behind the counter even though it absolutely wasn’t necessary. They'd already paid for the nicest room the hotel had to offer so there was no need to push for an upgrade. A bottle of chilled champagne on arrival would be nice, but not essential. It was the king size bed, the stunning waterfront views and the spa bath tub that were the real perks.

Ianto was looking forward to dispensing with his trousers and changing them for the shorts he'd packed at the top of his suitcase before they went to hit the high street. There'd be time for testing out the luxuriousness of the bed later.

As he avoided making eye contact with either of Jack or the poor young man having to politely rebuff Jack’s advances, he noticed another man standing in the hotel lobby, not queuing with a suitcase or lounging in one of the sleek looking suede chairs reading a newspaper or checking his phone; just standing there, and more unsettlingly, looking straight in their direction. Ianto turned away so it didn’t look like he was rudely staring back, but as Jack clutched a handful of key cards in neat little cardboard wallets, thrusting them at Ianto and making his way to the lift, Ianto couldn't help but notice from side on as he followed Jack, that the man was still standing there, and still looking in their general direction. Ianto didn’t feel comfortable until the lift doors closed, sealing them inside.

The man in the lobby was almost completely forgotten as they took in their hotel suite, which was everything it promised and more. Ianto could see how it would be considered totally acceptable to simply stay in the hotel and never leave the room. The furniture was lush and the small decorative items dotted here and there made it feel less like a hotel room than it did a home. Both the main living area and the bedroom both had sweeping wide balconies that gave excellent views of crystal blue ocean and perfect white sandy beaches, and the same balmy breeze floated through into the rooms. From somewhere nearby a seashell wind chime tinkled in the breeze.

‘We could stay here for a bit,’ Jack offered, giving the bed an experimental bounce.

‘Only long enough to unpack,’ Ianto replied. He didn’t want Jack getting distracted by the bed. Not right now, anyway.

Ianto carefully hung their clothes in the spacious walk-in robe, including his trousers, swapping them for shorts, and his shoes and socks for open toed sandals that he’d only bought for their trip, having nowhere else to wear them that would count as warm enough.

‘Still going out dressed as you are, I see,’ Ianto observed as he sat on the edge of the bed, tightening the strap on his sandal.

‘I’m good,’ Jack said. ‘It’ll take a lot more heat than this to make me uncomfortable. But, if it makes you happy…’ He took off his coat and draped it over his arm, before extending his free arm to Ianto. ‘Shall we go and start holidaying?’

Ianto couldn’t find it in him to complain. Holiday mode had taken over and he intended to enjoy it.



Their hotel was on a side street just off the main road, which made it the perfect location to be able to walk everywhere they wanted to go, from cafes and restaurants to shops selling trinkets and booking bicycles or paddleboards, and just a short walk further up to the marina where they could hop on any one of the many boats ferrying tourists from one island to the next.

‘What’s the rush?’ Ianto asked, feeling Jack’s hand holding his and tugging it along a little bit faster than he expected for a leisurely stroll.

‘We should start at the marina,’ Jack said. ‘See where we can go for the day.’

‘Or we could just acquaint ourselves with what’s on our doorstep for now.’

‘There should be a ferry out to the reef where we can look at the coral.’

‘We’re not dressed for snorkelling.’ He was looking forward to getting out in the water and admiring the rainbow coloured fish and delicate sea-flora, but they’d need swimming gear for that, or at least carry it in a backpack to change into.

‘It’s a glass bottom boat tour,’ Jack explained. ‘One ferry takes you out to the island and another boat does the tour. If we hurry we’ll make the 11am ferry for the day tour.’

Ianto checked his watch, then realised he wasn’t wearing one; all part of his vacation mantra. When on holidays, time has no relevance. ‘11am? Since when do you know all about it?’

It was Jack’s turn to roll his eyes at Ianto. ‘Since I was the one studying all the visitor brochures while you were still snoozing on the plane.’

‘You setting the itinerary whilst I’m relaxing?’ Ianto laughed good-naturedly. ‘Now I know we must be on holidays!’

‘The point of getting a red eye flight was so that we’d sleep on the way and not waste the whole first day dragging ourselves around with jetlag. We’ve had a good night's sleep and almost a full first day to get out and about and see the sights.’

‘We really don’t have to rush,’ Ianto said, trying to look up and down the line of shops on both sides of the street to see what shopping was on offer, and where it might be good to break for lunch a bit later. When he did, he spotted one of the souvenir shops across the road from them that he’d been hoping would be nearby to pick up Jack some extra clothes and, more disturbingly, noticed a man pawing through the rack sitting out on the footpath outside the shop. The same man from the hotel lobby, and the same man who whilst appearing to be browsing the apparel, seemed to have one eye on them as well.

‘You know what?’ Ianto said, squeezing his hand. ‘A ferry out to the islands sounds great. Let’s go.’



The marina sparkled as they approached it, opening out from the palm tree lined main street. There were no eyesore superyachts owned by billionaires for private consumption, only small vessels to take a handful of tourists or locals in between the many islands. Small sandwich boards advertised the various destinations and departure times as the boats bobbed along the pier.

‘Here we are,’ Jack said, pointing to a small ferry indicating it was headed out to one of the remote tropical outposts. ‘I’ll get the tickets,’ he said, rushing off to make arrangements.

That was a nice change, Ianto thought. Usually it was him having to organise everyone else. ‘I could get used to this,’ he muttered, lazily strolling after Jack so that he wasn’t inadvertently left behind in the excitement. He needn’t have worried as Jack cut a unique figure as the only man on the pier not dressed for the beach. Ianto shook his head and wondered what on earth he was ever going to do with him. Give it a day, he told himself, and Jack would change his tune.



‘It’s quite a bit nicer than the Bristol Channel,’ Ianto murmured as Jack wrapped around him as they stood at the bow of the ferry, letting the sea air whip past them as they cut through the water.

‘And no need to worry about alien squid, or anything else,’ Jack replied. ‘Look out there,’ he said, pointing. ‘That must be the island. According to the brochures, it’s completely uninhabited. A pristine nature reserve. Tourists by appointment only.’

‘You really did read the brochures, didn’t you? I thought you’d be flicking through the in-flight movies.’ Or just fidgeting because Jack could never stay still for more than a few minutes, let alone a fourteen hour flight.

‘Nah,’ Jack said. ‘We can watch movies anytime. I want to make sure we don’t miss anything good while we’re here. Who knows when we’ll next get a holiday.’

Ianto didn’t disagree. Time off was hard to come by. ‘Are you going to be telling me about all the different fish we’ll see?’

Jack scoffed. ‘It was a long flight, but it wasn't that long. I did sleep, you know.’

‘I was beginning to wonder.’



No sooner had they disembarked at the island than their connecting glass bottom boat tour got underway. For once they didn’t need to converse constantly, simply enjoying the stunning variety of brightly coloured tropical fish and bizarrely shaped corals. The trip lasted over an hour, and left them plenty of time afterwards to tour the island before their return ferry would arrive to take them home in time for pre-dinner cocktails on their first night in paradise.

As they wandered slowly along the beach, Ianto’s hand found Jack’s and his fingers intertwined, not caring who might see them, though it was unlikely anyone would, given the size of the ferry they’d arrived on and the remoteness of the island.

‘It’s almost too perfect, isn't it?’ Jack asked. ‘I wonder what it would be like to be the only ones living on a deserted tropical island. Just for a while, of course.’

Ianto was about to reply, something about wanting to know just how long Jack defined as being “a while” when another person caught his eye. They were a little way off, further down the beach. Strange how no one had been ahead of them on the beach before, but they must have taken some kind of shortcut through the palms and the underbrush. Ianto spotted them for a moment before they disappeared from view back into the greenery and he stopped in his tracks.

‘What is it?’ Jack asked.

‘We’re being followed.’

Jack turned and looked over his shoulder. ‘No, we’re not.’

‘Yes, we are.’ Ianto grabbed him and turned him back to face the way they were headed. ‘Over there, by the palms. There was a man.’

‘They’re called tourists, Ianto,’ Jack said, trying to downplay this sudden assumed paranoia. ‘Like us, but not as good looking.’

‘No.’ Ianto stood his ground. ‘It was a man in a khaki shirt and dark shorts, tan loafers. Dark hair. Dark sunglasses.’

‘Oh, well definitely not a tourist then, dressed like that!’ Jack teased.

‘He was watching us. Just like he was watching us in the hotel lobby, and again from a shop on the opposite side of the road. The same man.’

‘And you don’t think that's a coincidence? Was he on the ferry as well?’

Ianto blinked, then stopped. ‘I don’t know. I wasn’t really paying much attention to who else was on board.’ He huffed. ‘Does it matter? He’s here now. Up there somewhere, except he’s gone and hidden in the trees because he thinks we’ve seen him.’ He grabbed Jack by the hand and practically dragged him down the beach to the spot where he last saw their spy. ‘He was just here,’ he said, staring at a vacant patch of palms.

‘And now he’s not.’

‘Well he can’t have gotten far,’ Ianto replied, still tugging on Jack’s hand, trying to get him to come along through the trees. If they didn't see him, they should be able to hear which direction he was moving, just from the rustle of the vegetation.

‘Ianto, this is ridiculous.’

‘Ridiculous that we’ve got someone who’s followed our every move since we arrived? Since when do you not believe in coincidences? Now shush, and try not to make too much noise. He could be hiding behind any of these trees, waiting to pounce.’

Ianto could tell from the eye roll Jack thought he hadn’t seen that he didn’t quite believe him, but that he was going to humour his lover if only so he didn’t go traipsing into a tropical jungle all on his own.

As they tried to find a path through the dense vegetation and slippery rocks, what he couldn’t figure out was why someone would be following them here of all places. They could have stayed in Cardiff and followed them there a lot easier. Their daily lives were, if not entirely predictable, at least moderately consistent. And what did this man want? Ianto could only assume that he wasn’t following them with any friendly intent in mind.

They stumbled around for what felt like ages. Jack heaving a sigh every time Ianto made him stop and stay still so that they could listen for the sounds of someone else moving through the underbrush, but all they could hear were trickling streams and the unusual calls of strange tropical birds. After nearly breaking an ankle when his foot slipped on one of the rocks by a small stream, Ianto finally conceded that their man had gotten away.

‘Or there was no man to begin with!’ Jack hissed, making known his frustration at their wild goose chase. ‘And if he was real he was just a goddamn lost tourist! Now, can you please stop being so highly strung and just relax so that we can go back to being on holiday?’

Ianto sighed. Maybe Jack was right. He wasn’t very good at relaxing. Not in the sense of kicking back on a banana lounge with a large drink in one hand and a good book in the other. His idea of relaxation usually involved relabelling archive boxes and replacing all the brown paper and vinegar tags that were literally seconds from falling off and being lost to time forever.

It took them a little while to get their bearings and find the beach again. They walked back towards the jetty and were confronted by an unsettling sight. No people, and worse, no watercraft.

‘Jack, where’s the ferry?’

Jack looked at his watch and then his shoulders dropped as he tilted his head skywards, looking like he wanted to scream. ‘Gone. We missed it.’

‘But that can’t have left without us! Don't they do a headcount or something?’

Jack gave him a discerning look. ‘Did you see them counting anybody as we got on or off?’

‘Okay, fair point. So… when’s the next one coming in to pick us up?’

‘You’re asking me for the timetable?’

‘You’re the one that read all the brochures!’

Jack gritted his teeth. ‘Tomorrow,’ he said, forcing the word out. ‘Congratulations, we’re spending the night here now.’

Rather than be incredulous at the fact, Ianto's brain went in a completely different direction. ‘Oh, that’s clever!’

‘Not the word I would have used,’ Jack said, voicing his displeasure at day one of their vacation having taken such a calamitous turn.

‘This was all part of the plan,’ Ianto continued. ‘He wanted us to follow him.’

‘So that we’d get lost and miss the ferry back?’

‘So that he could get us here alone and kill us.’

‘Oh come on!’ Jack cried. ‘Do you know how crazy you sound right now?’ Jack let out a strangled laugh. ‘An assassin that follows us all the way here to try and murder us? Give me a break. I can’t even die.’

‘I’m serious,’ Ianto said, holding his ground. ‘Just because you’ve been in holiday mode since the minute we stepped out our front door. Someone had to pay attention. You say he’s a tourist. I say no one stands there and watches you.’ Jack made to speak but Ianto raised a finger at him. ‘Literally, watching us. Watching us check in, watching us whilst pretending to peruse gimmick t-shirts, and spying on us whilst we were wandering along this very beach.’

Jack sucked in a breath and let it out, long and slow, reigning in his temper and trying to see things from Ianto's point of view. ‘Okay then. You say he’s the real deal, so I'll take your word for it. For now,’ he qualified.

‘Thank you.’

‘So, the question remains. We’re stuck here for the night. What do we do?’

Ianto gave him a curious look. ‘You don't happen to have your gun under that coat do you?’

Jack laughed out loud. ‘One second you're telling me off for wearing my coat on vacation and now you're expecting me to be armed as well? It's pretty hard to make it through airport security and onto a plane carrying a loaded gun. Besides, what would I need it for? Threatening the olives in my Martini?’

‘Fine,’ Ianto huffed, feeling stupid for asking. ‘A simple no would have sufficed.’

Jack took him by the elbows. ‘Look, there’s not much we can do if there is some crazy guy here trying to knock us off. We should stay on the beach.’

‘Out in the open?’ That didn’t sound very safe, or smart.

‘Better than getting lost in the trees at night, where anything or anyone could be lurking just a yard away. This way no one gets near us without us seeing them first. And we’ve got the water on the other side of us, so that’s one less angle to have to watch.’

That did make quite a bit of sense, Ianto had to admit. ‘Okay, we have a plan.’ He always felt better when they had a plan, and not just Jack’s overconfident seat-of-their-pants style strategies that almost never worked out.

They walked towards the water's edge and sat themselves down in the sand, though facing away from the water lapping at the edges and instead facing towards any direction from which someone might think to sneak up on them. ‘So…’ Ianto said, breaking the awkward silence. ‘Day one of our perfect vacation.’

‘Not going so perfectly,’ Jack replied, trying hard to keep the annoyance out of his voice.

‘When does anything we do ever go perfectly?’ Ianto countered. ‘If it didn’t all go to shit, I'd start thinking something was terribly wrong.’

Jack chuckled. ‘You’re probably right.’



As the sun slowly dipped behind their backs, casting an orange glow against the palms they chatted quietly, though Ianto was doing most of the listening. He’d made the mistake of asking Jack to tell him about what else he’d seen in the visitor paraphernalia that he thought would be of interest whilst they were here, qualifying it with whether they were still alive in the morning to enjoy it, and Jack, in true Ianto-esque fashion, began to list in detail all the various sights to see and things to do, the restaurants to be tried, what was on the menu, the weather forecast for the next three weeks and all of the amenities that their hotel had to offer.

‘You know,’ Ianto finally said, crossing his legs under him as he repositioned himself on the sand. ‘I really don't think you slept one wink on that flight.’

‘I might have power napped,’ Jack confessed. ‘Truthfully, I was too excited to sleep.’ A well timed yawn escaped him. ‘That might have been a mistake now.’

Ianto found Jack's yawn contagious, following with several of his own. ‘I shouldn't be tired now,’ he said. ‘It’s about ten in the morning back in Cardiff.’

‘Except that’s ten in the morning and you haven’t slept all night.’

‘Touche. Perhaps we could take turns,’ he offered. ‘Each get an hour or two then swap.’

‘Okay. You wanna go first or shall I?’

‘You yawned first,’ Ianto said. ‘Why don’t you take the first nap?’

‘You’re sure?’

‘I’m okay.’ He rubbed up and down his bare arms. ‘A little cold though. Who knew it would get so chilly here once the sun goes down?’

Jack smirked, unfurling his greatcoat and draping it around Ianto’s shoulders. ‘Who said I wasn't dressed properly?’

Ianto gratefully tugged it close around his body. ‘You don't always have to be right, you know.’

‘I know,’ Jack said, lowering himself onto the sand and tucking an arm under his head. ‘It's just nice sometimes that I am right and you’re not Mister Know-it-all,’ he said, closing his eyes.

Ianto remained alert, watching the moonlit beach and the surrounding trees for a long while. Jack snored loudly and Ianto almost poked him in order to be able to better hear any other noises that didn’t belong. Instead he let Jack sleep, long after they might have swapped places. Jack was tired and Ianto was on edge, plus he didn’t have a watch and had no idea how much time had actually passed.

He spent the time wondering why someone would go to so much effort to follow them here and to try and do them harm. Surely it would have been easier to wait for the opportune moment back in Cardiff. They could easily have taken Ianto out any number of places, from picking up milk at the supermarket to grabbing him as he trudged tiredly up his front gate at two in the morning, looking for yesterday’s morning paper that had arrived many hours after he’d already left for work the day previous. Jack was a different prospect altogether. Did they know he was immortal? Killing him wouldn't achieve much, but then again, maybe whoever it was didn’t want them dead at all. Maybe they wanted to capture them and torture them for information. That made slightly more sense. They both knew a great deal of sensitive information, including all the access codes for Torchwood's security and computer systems, as well as the secure archives. He told himself he wouldn't give up a single piece of information, even if they started removing fingernails with pliers or hooking him up to live electrical cables. Of course, he didn't really know what it was possible to withstand, but he liked to think he would die first rather than squeal.



When he opened his eyes he was confused by the sound of waves lapping at the shore and his head resting on Jack's thigh, the long greatcoat draped over him like a blanket.

‘Morning,’ Jack said.

Ianto couldn't remember having traded places with Jack sometime late into the night, but he must have because Jack was stretched out, propped up on both arms, looking down at him. The sun was up and it was already beginning to warm, making him push off Jack's coat before he got overheated.

‘No assassins in the night,’ Jack observed. ‘Though you’d know that better than me. You were up most of the night. The moon had just about set when I woke and convinced you to grab an hour or two of rest.’

Ianto’s stomach growled and he resented waking up on the beautiful remote beach, wishing instead that they were in their hotel right now, scarfing down as much of the buffet breakfast menu as was on offer.

‘Good news, though,’ Jack carried on talking, ‘is that it’s nearly nine and the first ferry of the day should be about to arrive.’ He turned around on the sand and squinted out over the horizon. ‘I reckon that’s it just out there,’ he said, pointing to a far off speck. ‘We can hop aboard and she should be ready to head back by 9.30 in time to reach port, disembark its only two passengers and still have time left over before it trundles back for the 11am trip.’

Ianto massaged his neck where it was sore from having slept awkwardly on Jack’s leg. ‘Thank you, Captain Timetable.’

‘Just saying.’

They sat on the sand watching as the ferry grew closer, hearing its engines rumbling towards them. The crew were more than a little surprised to see them hopping aboard and asked if they’d just come over on the ferry this morning for the ride and didn’t want to stay for a few hours and explore the island. They didn’t argue with the explanation, agreeing that they were just here for the ferry ride there and back. They took seats at the back of the ferry and Ianto leaned into Jack's side, using it as an opportunity to nap for a further hour back to home port. Some holiday they were having so far.



Walking back along the jetty once they’d docked, Ianto said ‘I'm having a very long shower back at the hotel,’ able to smell his armpits from here. ‘And then we’re going out to find the closest place that does a massive greasy fry up. I don't care if they serve pineapple and mango on top, just so long as there’s a ton of bacon underneath.’

At least Ianto got his wish of a long shower, though it was made longer still by the fact that Jack wouldn't wait for him to finish in there first, making it a double shower with added benefits. By then he was absolutely famished and Jack wasn’t going to argue with him. He had to have been just as starving if the audible growl from his stomach was anything to go by.

All thoughts of spies and assassins had gone from his mind as they headed back down the main drag and he was considering whether he'd order a hot cappuccino or perhaps take it cold as an iced coffee, to go with his heart attack on a plate breakfast, which he should probably now call lunch. Given the hour, maybe he could add a steak on top. And a massive bowl of chips.

‘There's a lot more cocktail bars along this strip than I remember,’ Jack said, noting how every second place seemed to have a menu that only included liquid meals.

Ianto was about to agree with him when he stopped dead in his tracks, jack bungling into him. ‘What?’

‘That's him!’ Ianto said, pointing and not caring if it was rude. ‘The man I was telling you about.’

Jack followed Ianto’s accusatory finger. He matched some of Ianto's descriptions. Dark hair, dark sunglasses, tan loafers. New shirt – white this time – and a fresh pair of shorts. ‘You mean the good looking guy having drinks with the very, very attractive brunette? Rawr!’ Jack leaned in closer. ‘Think they're up for a foursome?’

‘I'm not kidding, Jack. He's the one that’s been watching us since we got here. He was in the lobby when we checked in, watching us on the high street, followed us on the boat over to the island…’ He’d said it all before, but it felt like it needed repeating to underscore the fact that the man had haunted their footsteps ever since arriving.

‘You said he was on the island with us waiting to kill us,’ Jack said. ‘Clearly not if he's here now.’

‘Maybe he had a private speedboat pick him up this morning when his assassination attempt failed.’

‘Oh, come on. Seriously? Does he look like an assassin to you?’ After a night sleeping rough on the beach, Jack was less amenable to Ianto's conclusions.

‘Doesn't the attractive woman on his arm give it away?’

‘You've been watching way too many James Bond movies. Look, I'm just going to go over there and ask.’

‘What?’

Jack walked confidently across to the bar and the streetview table where the man and his date were sitting, indulging in bright yellow drinks. ‘Hey, excuse me! Sorry to interrupt your mid-morning cocktails, but my boyfriend here can't shake the fact that he's seen you before. Help us out here. Old high school classmates? Former co-workers?’ Ianto tugged at Jack's elbow, trying to get him to shut up. ‘And as for your lovely lady friend here,’ Jack carried on, oblivious to Ianto’s insistent tugging, ‘now I know we've never met because I'd remember someone like you.’ That earned him a blush and a giggle as he threw one of his disarming smiles in her direction.

The man gave the tiniest hint of a smirk. ‘So, you've noticed me watching you?’

‘I told you!’ Ianto cried.

Jack silenced him with a shh! ‘So, who are you then?’

‘Major Leon Cartwright,’ he said, extending out a hand. ‘UNIT. I wanted to know what had brought two undercover Torchwood agents here to investigate. I was meant to be on holiday but if Torchwood is interested in something, then so are UNIT. When I didn’t see you get back on the ferry yesterday I did wonder if that had been your planned destination after all, but I couldn't stay out there all night whilst you were traipsing about after something alien. Figured if you didn't show up this morning I was going to take the afternoon ferry out there and go looking for you. Egg on my face if I went back to base and they found out you’d been right under my nose the whole time.’ He took a lazy sip of his drink. ‘Mind you, your cover could use some work though. You stood out like a sore thumb the moment you arrived.’

‘Our cover story?’ Ianto blurted out, gobsmacked. ‘We spent a freezing cold night marooned on a remote island! We were meant to be on holiday! Sipping chilled champagne, strolling along the beach under the moonlight, making obscenely loud love in our luxury hotel suite!’

Jack nudged Ianto a little bit behind him, putting himself between Ianto and the UNIT major. ‘Forgive him, he's still a little bit tightly sprung. It's been a long time since we’ve had a vacation.’

‘Oh, well my apologies then. Hard to switch the brain off from work, isn't it? Turns out we're both here for the same thing.’ He leaned closer and dropped his voice to a whisper. ‘Including the loud sex. I met Marie at the bar last night. Doesn't speak a word of English but she's like a tiger in the bedroom.’ He curled an eyebrow at Jack. ‘Bet she'd be up for threesomes and moresomes, if you get my drift.’

‘We’re good, thanks,’ Jack replied, looping an arm through Ianto’s before he could say anything. ‘If we see you round, maybe you can shout us a round of drinks sometime.’

‘Mi sua credit card e sua credit card,’ he said, raising his glass.

Ianto felt Jack drag him down the street, that arm clutching him like he was a runaway child. ‘Now, can we please go and start enjoying our holiday?’ Jack begged. ‘I admit you were sort of right, that we were being watched, but this has snowballed way too far and I don't want snow. I wanted warm sunny beaches and crystal blue waters and my gorgeous boyfriend getting around in a lot less clothes than he usually wears. You clearly need this break a lot more than I do. We’ll eat and then I think a nice long walk along the water would do you good.’

Ianto sighed. ‘Maybe we should just lock ourselves in our hotel room,’ he replied. ‘A few days sprawled on the balcony with a book is about as much excitement as I think I can handle.’

‘Whatever you like,’ Jack said. ‘Just so long as we leave here with you feeling less neurotic than when you arrived.’