Title: All the Difference
Fandom: Mass Effect
Rating: PG
Length: 527
Pairing: Kaidan Alenko/male Shepard
Content notes: Takes place approximately 11 months after the end of the Reaper war. (post Mass Effect 3 - destroy ending).
Author notes: After the end of the Reaper war, Shepard and Kaidan are at home near Vancouver. It is Shepard's voice. The quote is from The Road Not Taken - Robert Frost.
Summary: A safe place, for when memories overwhelm.

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I've been restless all evening. It's been a grey overcast day with snow flurries that dwindled into a steady cold rain. Part of me wants to go out walking in it. Another part of me has no interest in leaving the warmth of the house.

"Kaidan?"

He lifts his head from the datapad he's been poring over, trying to write a report to the Council, I guess. His reading glasses slip down his nose as he meets my eyes over the top of the wire frames. And he doesn't say anything, seemingly expecting me to say something more.

"Didn't you just say something to me? I wouldn't have disturbed you otherwise. That report must be important."

He shakes his head. "No, just routine. But I didn't say anything, John. I was just sitting here trying to figure out how to convince the Council that it's long past time to offer the elcor a council seat."

Settling down onto the couch beside him, I offer to share my beer. He accepts the half-empty bottle, handing it back after taking a long swallow. "Thanks. I'd been meaning to get up and get one."

He returns his attention to the datapad. It's time for a more direct approach.

"Kaidan?"

When he looks up again, he takes off the glasses, giving me an appraising look. "Do you feel like I'm ignoring you?"

He always was too perceptive. I lean in to rest my forehead against his. "No. I think you have something you want to get done and I'm a selfish bastard for keeping you from it."

Kaidan begins to reply, but a kiss is enough to stop the denial. But he's persistent as well as perceptive. "John, this council stuff can wait. There's something on your mind – tell me?"

"This is going to sound silly." A long sigh escapes before I give in. "Just talk to me, Kaidan. Sometime I just need to hear your voice. It helps keep some of the memories away."

This time he kisses me, whispering against my lips that he loves me. "Maybe I can do better than talk. I could read to you. Would that help?"

I nod, anything to hear his voice. "That sounds nice."

"Okay then. I'll be right back."

When he returns after a few minutes with an old paper book in hand, he sinks onto the couch next to me. "Put your feet up and rest your head in my lap."

Settling happily onto the galaxy's best pillow, I'm curious. "What are you going to read?"

He keeps the book out of my reach. "Not a lot of choice, Shepard. I could read that council report on elcor trade policies. That would probably be funnier if I'd written it in elcor though. And my omni-tool is full of quarian literature – romance novels basically – from Tali. So I thought of this. The book was my mother's."

His voice is already having an effect. Lying with an ear practically against his abdomen, I can almost feel the sound. My eyes start to drift closed as he searches for the page he wants. When he begins to read, his voice is low and burnished. Exactly what I need.

Two roads diverged in a yellow wood...

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