Title: Secret Ingredient
Fandom: Mass Effect
Rating: PG
Length: 1573
Pairings, Characters: Kaidan Alenko/male Shepard, Elena Alenko
Content notes: Takes place approximately fourteen months after the end of the Reaper war (Mass Effect 3, destroy ending).
Author notes: After the war, Shepard and Kaidan are living in Vancouver. This is Kaidan's voice.
Summary: Shepard has a cold.

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I'm worried about Shepard.

Up till now he's been pretty lucky not to have his recovery set back by any annoying routine illnesses. Oh, he picked up some scary bugs when he was in the hospital, but they had him right there to treat him.

I don't think this is anything dire. It might even be my fault. I picked up a cold virus a couple weeks ago, possibly from one of my visits to the young biotics at Kahlee's school. I took meds for it and it cleared up pretty fast, but those drugs don't work for Shepard. Something odd about his rebuilt immune system I guess.

So he suffers. I make him as comfortable as I can. Warm blankets, plenty of vids including a hard-to-find copy of the very first Blasto movie. One from before his first big hit. I make him tea at all hours of the night.

Nothing is really helping. Time to call in the big guns.

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"Mom? Sorry to bother you this late at night... but it's about Shepard."

"Is he all right? What happened, little one?"

She sounds so worried. He really is her other son now. I explain the situation.

"And he won't eat anything... I was wondering. Could I maybe get your recipe for the chicken soup you used to make for me when I felt awful?"

"Of course! I was just going to ask if you'd tried that. I'll shoot it right to your omni-tool. But there's one thing... it's kind of a non-recipe. Oh it has ingredients. Nothing out of the ordinary. But the proportions are up to your taste."

"That's okay, Mom. I remember how it should taste. I can try to recreate that."

"There's one other thing you have to add. But I don't think that will be a problem for you."

I'm imagining all sorts of secret ingredients... wine, whiskey, some exotic spice. Fortunately she doesn't keep me wondering long.

"You have to add the love, Kaidan. As much as you can manage. Even if he's grumpy and thinks it's too much. It's not like salt, you know. You can't ever add too much."

"Heh. I hear you. You never stinted on that part either. And I can remember Dad getting pretty damn cranky when he was sick. I guess I was probably the same."

I can hear her smile. "Oh yes, Michael was the worst ever. But I'm guessing John might be just as bad. Try it, little one. And let me know how it works, okay?"

"I will, Mom. For sure. And thanks."

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Lucky for me, I don't have to go out to buy any ingredients. It's all stuff that we have around. Cooking it takes some time though, no shortcuts allowed. This starts with real chicken, not pre-made broth.

It takes most of the day, but it's starting to smell good... just a little longer on the stove to blend all the flavors. Good timing, I can hear Shepard waking up, rolling around restlessly.

Sitting down next to him on the bed, I take his hand. He's still feverish, but less so than yesterday. "How are you feeling? You slept a few hours at least."

"Like I got run over by a herd of wild varren and the krogans chasing them. My head... and my chest. Pretty hard to get a deep breath..."

I scoot close enough to lift his upper body into my arms and just hold him close, rocking him slowly.

"And it's too bright... could you adjust the shades before you go?"

"I will... but who said I'm going anywhere just yet. Close your eyes... it's mostly a bright moon right now."

"Cold, Kaidan... so cold..."

He's wearing a long sleeved t-shirt and sweat-pants. "You want your hoodie? It's right here. Or just let me hold you, okay? You're always telling me I'm hot."

That brings a tiny smile. "You are hot, Kaidan. In every way that matters." His smile fades. "But I can't do anything about that right now either... Fucking body... fails me when I need it."

I draw his head closer against my shoulder, feeling his arm wrapping around my waist as he soaks up my body heat. I hiss his forehead and drop my voice to a low whisper.

"You'll make up for lost time, John. I have faith in that body of yours. And I love it, with all its quirks. Like I love you. No reservations."

His breathing seems to ease, sitting more upright, and I just hold him for maybe half an hour. We don't say much, but I feel like maybe I'm helping a little. The smells from the kitchen reminds me that I have one more tactic.

"John, I'm going to replace me with some pillows to help you stay upright. You're breathing better that way. And I have something for you. It's in the kitchen so I need to go get it. You'll be ok?"

"Mmm, don't go, Kaidan."

"I'll be right back. This is something special."

I catch a flicker of curiosity in his eyes, but I'll let him wonder. I adjust the shades just a little on my way out. I hate to close off the view. Despite the full moon, every star in the sky seems to be out, glittering. The water of the bay shimmers in the moonlight too. I wish I could share the view with Shepard. If he felt better, he'd appreciate it.
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Tasting the soup, I adjust the seasoning. Needs a little pepper if he's going to taste it thru the dull haze of his cold. It is good though... and tastes a lot like what I remember my mom making for me. Many times.

I half-fill a large bowl with the steaming broth and return to the bedroom with a tray.

"Here you go, John. My mother's special chicken soup. She used to make it for me when I was sick. And for Dad."

He looks from the tray to me and back again, shaking his head.

"Oh no... Kaidan. Chicken soup. Really? That sounds like an old movie remedy. You expect soup to cure this..."

I must look as disappointed as I feel. I start to turn back toward the kitchen.

"Shit. Damn it, Kaidan, I'm sorry. That was uncalled for. I don't know what made me even think that, much less say it. Don't go."

I turn back toward him, sitting down on the bed this time, with the tray between us. "Will you at least try it? It's good soup no matter what else it might be... and you should eat something, you know."

He shakes his head. "I'm not hungry..."

I expected that. "My mother will ask me how you liked it... what do you want me to tell her? That you wouldn't even taste it?"

"Low blow, Alenko."

I know that was a seriously guilt-inducing move, but sometimes you have to use whatever weapon you have.

"I woke her up to ask her for the recipe. You know she'll ask. She even told me the secret ingredient. But you'd have to taste it to even begin to guess what it is."

There's a small spark in his eyes at the implied challenge. He prides himself on being about to detect every ingredient in a dish, every obscure spice. He doesn't cook very often himself, but he has a pretty damn amazing palate.

"Okay... I'll try it. On one condition."

"Anything for you."

He sits up a little more, leaning against the pile of pillows behind him, but doesn't reach for the spoon.

"That spoon looks heavy. Feed me, Kaidan?"

Okay, that nearly breaks my heart. Between one breath and the next, I'm back by his bedside in the hospital, coaxing him to eat a little, helping him when his bandaged arms and damaged hand made it hard to even hold a cup or a spoon. I'd spent many mealtimes helping him eat. Feeding him.

I have to wipe at my eyes with the cuff of my shirt. But I nod and slip off the bed to pull a chair up beside him so he won't have to lean forward.

After trying the first spoonful myself to be sure it's not too hot, I offer him a taste. He swallows it... and smiles. I offer another... and another.

"It's good. Warm... a little spicy. White peppercorns maybe? A little tarragon?"

"You're right so far. I'm glad you like it. Mom will be relieved to hear it too. She was probably afraid I'd mess up her special recipe."

He continues to eat, spoonful by spoonful, as I offer it. I tilt the bowl as it nears empty to get the last drops. He licks his lips after finishing it.

As I put down the spoon, he reaches for my hand, threading his fingers with mine. "Guess I was more hungry than I thought." He cocks his head, searching my face. "It tasted really good. Didn't taste any secret mystery ingredients though."

Returning his smile, I squeeze his hand and lean in to kiss him gently. "I just added a little more of that. Can you taste it now?"

He thinks about it for a long moment then pulls me back to him to kiss me in return.

"I think I've figured it out, Kaidan. Love you too."

Maybe he'll feel well enough to want to do a little stargazing with me. The night isn't over yet.

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