Title: Starfleet issue
Fandom: Star Trek: Voyager
Rating: G
Length: 100 words
Content notes: USS Voyager POV (sort of...)
Author notes: Ep tag for Live Fast and Prosper
Summary: Trader. The one word that Mr Neelix must eradicate from his vocabulary.

Trader. The one word that Mr Neelix must eradicate from his vocabulary.

Whenever he acquires parts, fuel and technology for me, I malfunction to the point of being angry throughout my fifteen decks and two hundred and fifty seven rooms. I inform the crew that I am unwell by using my gremlins to shut down the shipwide overrides, make turbolifts too fast or too slow, break the replicators and sonic showers.

The source of my current non-Starfleet issued woes is a heating coil that Mr Neelix has acquired but to be bettered by con-artists impersonating the command team is humiliating.