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Title: Why Double-0's Make Bad Babysitters
Fandom: James Bond
Pairing: James Bond/Q
Rating: G
Length: 793
Summary: Q discovers that, contrary to popular opinion, double-0 agents are not good at everything.

~*~

Q did his best not to swear as he juggled his ID, laptop, bulging messenger bag, Andy’s rucksack and Andy himself. He tried to avoid bringing Andy into MI6 with him unless it was absolutely necessary. It wasn’t that he wasn’t allowed to or that M disapproved (quite the opposite, in fact), it was just that he and Bond wanted to keep Andy away from what they did as much as possible. Andy, on the other hand, absolutely loved it when he was allowed to come into Vauxhall.

As the son of Q and Bond, he had been immediately adopted by Q-branch and the double-0’s, all of whom utterly adored him. In fact, Q had never seen anything quite so amusing as how quickly the hardest, most jaded agents in the British SIS turned to mush when faced with the blond-haired, green-eyed progeny of Bond and Q. Q’s close friendship with Tanner meant that the Chief of Staff had been adopted into the Quartermasters pack alongside Alec Trevelyan, both men adding the moniker of ‘uncle’ to their list of titles. The other, somewhat surprising, addition to Andy’s cohort of uncles was M. As tenacious as both of his parents, Andy had adopted M when he was barely 2. With Bond away on a mission and Q deeply engrossed in a meeting with Tanner, Andy had toddled past an oblivious Moneypenny into M’s office. When a terrified Q had burst in twenty minutes later, he had found the head of MI6 reading Winnie-the-Pooh to Q’s delighted son. That had been that; M had earnt the moniker of ‘Uncle M’ and become part of the Bond family pack.

The only person that Andy hadn’t taken to with alacrity was Eve Moneypenny and, as such, both Q and Bond always did their best to make sure that the two were nowhere near each other. Then again, both Bond and Q tried to avoid M’s assistant unless it was for work purposes; even now, she still wasn’t overjoyed that she had lost Bond to Q, regardless of the fact that Bond had never been interested in her. Still, even without Moneypenny on side, they were never short of babysitters when they did have to bring Andy to work with them such as today, when Bond was on a mission and Q was called in to deal with whatever had gone wrong.

Upon being briefed, it didn’t take Q long to realise that this wasn’t something that he could fix quickly. Not wanting Andy to become bored and wander off, undoubtedly getting himself into trouble in the process (he was far too much like Bond in that respect, even at his young age), Q summoned R with a jerk of his head. A few words and a hug and a kiss for his son later, R was leading Andy away so that Q could concentrate on the mission safe in the knowledge that Andy was being looked after and they could return to their day as soon as possible.

(~*~)

Several hours later, satisfied that the mission was complete and the agent in question was on their way back to London, Q rapped out a series of orders to the minions that had worked with him before signing off himself. Looking around, he vaguely remembered R leading Andy away in the early stages of the mission and frowned when he saw his second-in-command coming out of R&D with no sign of his son. Upon questioning her, he found that something else had come up and so 009, along with a few other double-0’s who were currently on site, had volunteered to take on babysitting Andy for the day. As R finished speaking, the agent in question appeared through the main doors of Q-branch, Q’s eyes narrowing at the sight of him.

“009. This may sound like a stupid question but you seem to be missing something. Where’s my son?”

“Yes, well, about that. There’s been a slight problem. Me and a few of the other double-0’s, we were playing hide and seek with Andy and, well, what I mean to say is well …. wethinkwe’velostAndy.”

A terrified silence descended over Q-branch as Q gave a low growl and more than a few minions ducked for cover, all of those near to 009 taking several precautionary steps back. Normally, and quite rightly so, Bond was the feared half of the Quartermaster/007 duo but this was different. 009

“I’m sorry 009, I thought I just heard you say that you think you’ve lost my son. If he is not found and safely in my arms within the next 15minutes then you will wish that Bond was here instead of me. Do I make myself perfectly clear?”

“Yes, Sir.”

“Good. Now, what are you still doing here?”