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due South : Fanfic : Breaking the Fast

  • Jun. 10th, 2012 at 6:02 PM
Title : Breaking the Fast
Fandom : due South
Pairing : intimation of Fraser/Kowalski
Characters : Benton Fraser, Ray Vecchio, Ray Kowalski
Rating : General Audiences
Word Count : 102

Author Notes # 1 : Written in the poetic form of a tanka : five-line stanzas where the first and third lines are each five syllables and where the second, fourth, and fifth lines are each seven syllables.

Author Notes # 2 : According to the S.L.A.A. definition, anorexia involves "the compulsive avoidance of receiving social, sexual, and/or emotional nourishment".

Summary : anorexic!Fraser and h/c.



Anorexia :
avoidance of nourishment...
a kind of control...
a kind of self-punishment...
and not always about food.

Fraser was starving,
had been starving for a long
time, had been choosing
to starve...except for the one
binge that was Victoria.

Fraser risked calling
Vecchio his best friend, a
friendship riddled by
bullets, made stronger with two
axes...gone undercover.

Then came Kowalski
into Fraser's personal
space instantly, with
an embrace and words that had
the sound of intimacy.

From the shared fire that
first day to always knowing
that they were partners,
an end to Fraser's fasting
would come with Ray Kowalski.

Comments

[identity profile] http://users.livejournal.com/demon_bride_/ wrote:
Jun. 11th, 2012 09:05 am (UTC)
Oh Wow... damn that's beautiful :) and so sad... the first part. But it does fit Fraser's profile... which is even sadder ;) I loved the reference to the "two axes" XD I can see Vecchio in the hospital saying "I don't have an axe" and Fraser smiling at him for the first time in a long time.
The 'binge' that was Victoria... that explains the mound of bad feeling in the aftermath. Now I'm feeling all warm and fuzzy, Ray will end his fasting... oh that's such a good expression. This was a great start in my week :)
[identity profile] ride-4ever.livejournal.com wrote:
Jun. 12th, 2012 09:55 pm (UTC)
Glad you got ALL THE FEELINGS from this! And your comments gave ME warm fuzzies!
[identity profile] bghost.livejournal.com wrote:
Jun. 11th, 2012 12:18 pm (UTC)
Yay! You got it in, just in time. Excellence!

Yes, I absolutely love the metaphor of sex as food. So many references to hunger in VS and Letting Go, and the oral fixation, sucking her fingers and so on. The very first thing RayV tries to do for Fraser socially is feed him.

But the definition of anorexia is interesting. We know, from the 'glut' that Fraser is really a very sexual being, so his buttoned back 'normal' persona is obviously the act. What does he need to act for, that becomes the question.

Well done! (And I haven't attempted tanka in years... could be over a decade by now. I'm impressed how smooth and effortless you make it appear... I know how much effort that takes.)
[identity profile] ride-4ever.livejournal.com wrote:
Jun. 12th, 2012 09:52 pm (UTC)
Just in time, yes...with less than 10 minutes to spare.

HUGELY oral-fixated...as you point out also with Fraser sucking on Victoria's fingers *guh* which I did think about but didn't detail in this particular piece.

Also, in terms of canon arc, RayV's friendship enables Fraser to become more of a befriender...on RayK's first day, it's Fraser who makes the food-related social gesture.



[identity profile] bghost.livejournal.com wrote:
Jun. 12th, 2012 10:00 pm (UTC)
Oh yes! That's true... it shows in a way how far Fraser has grown through his friendship with Vecchio. Before he knew his first Ray, Fraser would never have thought anyone would consider spending time with him, wouldn't have known how to make a friendly overture... wouldn't even have known he needed to, perhaps. If Vecchio had never been Benny's friend, then Fraser wouldn't havfe been able to be Kowalksi's friend... both men inhabit huge landscapes in Fraser's spiritual world, and both men make Fraser a better man in the end.

Very interesting point about Fraser being the one able to offer a friendly food related gesture. (In one of my fics I have Fraser taking Kowalski to the Chinese restaurant he ate at with Vecchio, because I was trying to get the point across on some vague level. But you articulated it more clearly than I did.)
[identity profile] ride-4ever.livejournal.com wrote:
Jun. 12th, 2012 10:03 pm (UTC)
Ah. We had the same concepts in mind! Duet.....
[identity profile] ride-4ever.livejournal.com wrote:
Jun. 12th, 2012 10:07 pm (UTC)
I encourage you to add to your comment above the link to your fic with the Chinese restaurant scene. Someone reading these posts might go "hmmmm...I'd like to read that" but then not know how to find it.
[identity profile] bghost.livejournal.com wrote:
Jun. 12th, 2012 10:19 pm (UTC)
Oh... well, thank you, but it's one of my casefics, which as you know are fairly long, and the scene itself is in the first chapter. Hum... just realised that I had Fraser cooking for Ray and Stella in my second Kowalski casefic...

Well, this is the one set just after Fraser invited Ray for food at the end of Burning Down the House. First chapter has the meal in it. http://archiveofourown.org/works/383220/chapters/627009



this one has Fraser making RayK a hangover cure, and cooking lasagne (according to Ma Vecchio's recipe) for Ray and Stella. (Ray's worried it will be like a summit of war with Fraser as the UN)That's chapter three, appropriately called "dinner with Stella." http://archiveofourown.org/works/383220/chapters/627009


And then, in wizardverse I've had Kowalski doing a lot of feeding Fraser, in Tacitus particularly, where neither of them is talking about what they sort of don't know.
[identity profile] ride-4ever.livejournal.com wrote:
Jun. 12th, 2012 10:26 pm (UTC)
Good! Glad you added this!

And I madly love your phrase here : "where neither of them is talking about what they sort of don't know". *g*
[identity profile] love-jackianto.livejournal.com wrote:
Jun. 11th, 2012 12:31 pm (UTC)
Oh, very nice.
[identity profile] ride-4ever.livejournal.com wrote:
Jun. 12th, 2012 09:41 pm (UTC)
Yay! Glad you liked and commented!

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