Challenge 66 : Z

Title: Do You Say "Zee" or Do You Say "Zed"?
Fandom: due South
Characters: Benton Fraser, Ray Kowalski
Rating: Gen
Tags: Humor ; Dialogue-Only
Word Count: Triple Drabble (300 words)

AN #1: This fic contains twenty-one occurrences of someone or something that starts with the letter Z (overachiever much?).
AN #2: TYK to old_grognard for beta...and for his hilarious spot-on impersonations of Fraser and both Rays.

Summary: Fraser lectures Ray about the letter "zed". Ray tries to sleep through the lecture.

Fic at AO3 : http://archiveofourown.org/works/1065411







“So the Duck Boys got to the scene right after me, like I was only halfway outta the GTO when they pulled up. Someone musta tipped the perps; they’d lit out so fast they left one of the motorcycles behind. Huey asks ‘whose motorcycle is this?’ and Dewey chimes in with ‘it’s a chopper, baby,’ so I just had to say ‘whose chopper is this? – it’s Zed’s’….”

“Who’s Zed?”

“Heh, Fraser, that’s exactly what the chick in the movie says, too. And then Bruce Willis says ‘Zed’s dead, baby.’ ”

“I’m afraid I don’t understand the reference, Ray…although I’m sure you don’t mean Paul Zed, the former member of the Canadian Parliament…or anything having to do with the last letter of the alphabet….”

“Nope. I don’t make references to members of the Canadian Government, former or otherwise….”

“Well, actually, Dief is named after….”

“…and I come from this little place called America where we end the alphabet with a zee.”

“As a matter of fact, the Canadians of Newfoundland use the ‘zee’ pronunciation.”

“Huh, you don’t say.”

“On the contrary, Ray, I do say.”

“No, Frase, that was one of those idioticmatic…uh…idiomatic…things. Means ‘mildly surprised’.”

“Yes, well…it might also surprise you to know that the ‘zed’ pronunciation is, internationally, more common than the ‘zee’ pronunciation, being used in both British English and Commonwealth English, having been derived from the original Greek letter of zeta.”

“Much more of this zed zee stuff and I’ll start ‘catching some zees’.”

“Catching…?”

“It means ‘sleeping,’ Fraser.”

“Ah. In conclusion then: there is the French zede, the German and Dutch and Polish and Romanian and Czech zet, the Spanish and Italian zeta, the Swedish zäta, the Norwegian zett, the Portuguese ze, the….”

“zzzzzzzzzz”

“Ray.”

“zzzzzzzzzz”

“Ray.”

“zzzzzzzzzz”

“Ray. Ray! RAY!”