Title: Shut Up
Fandom: The Mentalist
Rating: G
Length: ≈ 240 words.
Content notes: Written for the "wire" prompt on fan_flashworks and the August challenge at Paint It Red (sine qua non, an indispensable thing).
Author notes: thanks to xsabrix for looking it over :)
Summary: Just another day's conversation at the CBI.



“I said no, Jane.”

“But why not, Lisbon? What’s wrong with my plan?”

“Where shall I start? It’s dangerous, it’s absurd, it doesn’t even give us any useable evidence…”

“It most certainly does, since Rigsby would be wearing a wire.”

“A wire? Great, now your plan is illegal, too!”

“Oh, picky. Of course he should be wired, it’s condicio sine qua non for it to be any use.”

“Condicio sine qua non?”

“It’s Latin for ‘an indispensable condition’ – ”

“I know what sine qua non means, Jane! And do you know what really is sine qua non for a police investigation? Staying within the law!”

“Really, Lisbon, you’ll never catch this man if you insist on observing all these trifling regulations. Come on, Cho, Rigsby, back me up.”

“Hey, don’t get me involved!”

“Sorry, Jane, the boss is right. We can’t use a wire.”

“You don’t really think that, Cho. Your body language is saying you agree with me.”

“Then it’s lying.”

“Oh, but that’s the beauty of body language, it can’t lie! You know that my plan is the only hope we’ve got of cracking this case.”

“Jane, what’s my body language saying?”

“Ah… that unless I shut up about my completely excellent plan, you are going to inflict completely unreasonable violence on me.”

“Close enough. Now, does anyone have any useful ideas?”

“My ideas are useful – OW! Well, that was uncalled for.”

“Oh, shut up, Jane.”