Title:Handy Man
Fandom: The Breakfast Club
Rating: PG13
Length: 1000 words drabble-on
Content notes: none
Author notes: This started out intended as a Yuletide treat, then ended up here.
Summary: A car ride home with his mother has Brian’s mind somewhere else.


1 ."Who was that young man with the long hair and scruffy outfit," Brian's mother said, picking him up after school, a few days after the weirdest (best, and only) Saturday detention he'd ever been forced to endure. Oh, who was he kidding? Sure, at first it had been awful, and awkward and weird, being stuck with all those kids from completely different cliques. Not that you could call, what was it Bender had called him? A "neo-maxi-zoom-dweebie" a clique exactly. But then it changed, or maybe they changed each other. Brian was certainly different. And it all started with Bender.

2 . "Um. That was Bender. John. John Bender." Who had actually talked to him. What he'd said was, "still keeping it in your pants, kid?" But Brian could tell he wasn't trying to be a jerk. Besides, what was in his pants right now was what was normally there. No foreign substances that John, with his big, rough, hands had put in there, like he owned Brian, or something that Brian didn't want to, but couldn't stop thinking about.

Yeah, there was nothing like getting an erection in the car with your mother. Brian rearranged his school stuff, hiding the evidence.

3. "He's certainly arresting. Are you friends? He doesn't look like anyone I've seen you play with before, and I'd definitely notice him."

Jesus. She said it like she was talking about one of the her soap actors, or James Dean, or something. That was entirely too creepy for him. Brian wasn't used to feeling 'that way' about a guy, or anyone real, really (Wonder Woman and her golden lasso didn't count), but the idea of his mother thinking the same way he did? “God, Mom! I'm 15. I have friends.(Sort of) I don't play. I'm not a little kid."


4.
"Oh, honey, I know. You're a big boy! Practically a man." This was not helping. She was probably about 3 seconds away from wiping his face with her thumb and saliva. OK, maybe it was helping, a little. That issue he'd had with his pants was going away.

"I guess Bender's a friend. He's cool." He didn't mention how or where they'd met. His mother hadn't asked much about that day. It was just,"we're never doing this again, right?" Only it wasn't an actual question.

"As long as he's not 'too cool for school' I guess it's all right.”

5. "He's pretty busy, Mom. I don't imagine he'll be stopping over for Bosco and Salerno Butter Cookies anytime soon." Yeah, he's more of a Chee-Tos and weed kind of guy. And there he went again, picturing Bender's hands, his fingers holding the joint to his lips, to Brian's lips, pleased and proud of how long Brian had learned to hold in the smoke. John's fingers, dusted with orange, that wide mouth sucking them off, one by one. Brian doing the same thing, to John. Tasting salt and cheese-food and whatever amazing taste Bender's hands would have, Bender's skin, Bender everywhere.

6. Brian could imagine with the best of them, how Bender might touch him, how he would kiss. The way his lips would feel. He'd come across angry, at first. Swearing Brian to secrecy. He wouldn't want any of the other stoner kids to know he did this sort of thing. Brian doesn't know either. Not really. It just felt like there was a moment there, something between them. It wasn't like he could ask Bender. John wasn't a "talking it out" kind of guy, Breakfast Club testimonial aside. Brian would have be the one to act first. To risk himself.

7. What he can't imagine is what it might mean to Bender, what he might mean. Two ports in a storm, I'll try anything once? We don't talk about Breakfast Club? (Author apologizes for the anachronism.) Bender's probably not a hearts and flowers kind of guy, even if he can pull of the diamond earring look to piss off the prom princess's pretentious parents.

Brian thinks it might be more than that, because if he learned anything that day, it was that there was more to Bender than Brian imagined. More to each of them, but John had been the revelation.


8. They're pulling into their driveway before he notices his mother is talking to him again.

"Brian! Are you even listening to me? Is this what I've got to look forward to until you go off to college? If you get into a college. Schools don't look kindly on kids who are discipline problems."

"I'm not a discipline problem. I wasn't trying to hurt anybody." Else.

"I certainly hope not. You know, that nice principal of yours suggested we might want to take you to see somebody, since you're so troubled."

"Nice isn't a word I'd use to describe Mr Vernon."

9. Troubled? Brian guessed he was troubled, but it wasn't because of the stupid elephant lamp. At this point he could care less that the damn thing wouldn't light for him no matter how many times he read the instructions and rewired it. Bender could have done it on his first try. Had done, most likely.

What would his mother think if he replied, "Yeah, good idea. I can ask them how to approach the guy you think might be into you. The one you asked about. Because I agree, he's kind of hot. He'd be the best bad influence, ever.”

10. But it's not like seeing a shrink helped Alison, any. And it's not something Brian feels the need to do, either. So he just says, "I don't think it's necessary, I'm not going to get myself in any more trouble."

"Good. Because if this behavior continues, there will be consequences beyond spending 40 minutes talking to a professional once or twice a week."

"I understand. You don't need to worry." He didn't have any more elephants to make. Besides, he was pretty sure someone with more experience than he had in certain areas might be up for some personal tutoring.