Title: Hard to spot
Fandom: Torchwood
Characters: Ianto, Jack, Gwen
Author: m_findlow
Rating: PG
Length: 1,451words
Content notes: None
Author notes: Written for Challenge 495 Amnesty, using Challenge 35 - Elusive or Ephemeral
Summary: The latest object to drop through the rift is proving difficult to locate.



‘Where are you?’ Jack muttered to himself as he scanned the dunes from left to right and back again. He grunted as he looked at his PDA, which still gave him absolutely nothing. Well, that was helpful, he thought. He couldn't find anything anywhere near registering on his PDA. It was just going to be one of those days, wasn't it?

Jack puffed out of breath, stopped and turned to look around at the beach he’d just traversed. Unfortunately the rift computers hadn't been very good at pinpointing the exact location of their mystery object. All it could do was give them something close to a two mile stretch of Welsh coastline which meant it could literally be just about anywhere. It was also not overly huge – perhaps the size of a football and not much more – which certainly didn't make the job any easier.

Given the amount of beach they had to search he'd split them up. He'd gone west a mile and a half and sent Gwen east a mile and a half, and then left Ianto to search the beach in between. Half a mile either way give or take just to be sure, he decided. If the rift computer couldn't figure out exactly where the thing was, God alone knew exactly how accurate they'd been in the first place. It wouldn't hurt to search another half a mile although now he was beginning to regret the decision.

He'd been up and down three quarters of a mile worth of beach now and found absolutely nothing except for a few odd seashells, one beer can, half a dead seagull and an abandoned, and mostly buried, beach towel. None of those things had shown any residual rift radiation, so it was easy to dismiss them as just general detritus on a beach that wasn't exactly known for its tourists. It wasn't a completely ugly beach; it still had some decent sand but there were also patches that were just rocks and shale and completely unsuitable for lying down on and sunbathing, assuming that Wales ever got any sun at all.

He was tempted to tap on his earpiece and ask the other two if they’d had any luck but he assumed naturally that if they had indeed found something they would have told him about it and not just left him wandering this stretch of sand endlessly for a few extra hours, just as payback for something else he might have made them do that was unpleasant at some point earlier in the week. That wasn’t beneath them, but he liked to think that he wasn't that much of a jerk. Bosses were allowed to be slightly demanding, weren't they?

He twiddled the settings on his PDA again and swung it around in a slow deliberate arc and then watched for a result. Nothing. He sighed. Clearly his stretch of beach wasn't the ticket. ‘Might as well go and help the others,’ he said to himself.

He marched back down the beach, boots sinking into the soft sand, wind whipping at the edges of his coat and trying to blow more sand into his face, rubbing at a small bit that managed to find its way into the corner of his eye. Today was definitely not the day for taking a dip in the ocean. The grey skies were reflected in the even darker grey water, which was speckled with whitecaps. Set out a towel on a day like today and it would have blown away in three seconds flat. Maybe it was decent kite flying weather but then again he’d never flown a kite and suddenly began wondering why the hell not. Was kite flying still a thing? Maybe he could take Ianto back down here on another day under the auspices of a date and they could go kite flying. He imagined that was a sort of thing that would tickle Ianto’s fancy, though he couldn't quite say why.

As he kept walking down the length of beach he finally spotted the man himself, except that he wasn't standing and searching the beach in the way that Jack expected him to. Jack frowned as watched Ianto just sitting down on the sand. As he got closer he noticed that Ianto had his shoes and socks removed as well. It was one thing that he didn't like getting sand in his nice polished shoes, but this was altogether a bit weird. He told Ianto that morning where they were going and that perhaps wearing his traditional suit wasn't the best attire for the destination but Ianto just shrugged him off. If Jack remembered correctly, the last time they’d had to go to the beach he’d heard Ianto moaning to Suzie about the sand that got stuck in his shoes afterwards, and kept repeating that fact all afternoon. Sometimes pride was a fragile thing, but the last thing Jack expected was the most conscientious member of his team sitting there sunning himself on a grey miserable day on a cold, wet, windy Welsh beach.

‘Ianto? Everything okay?’

Ianto looked up as if he was somewhat surprised to find Jack there standing over him. ‘I think so.’ Then his face scrunched up. ‘Then again, maybe… I… I'm not so sure.’

‘What’s been happening?’ Jack asked cautiously.

Ianto pulled his knees to his chest, wrapping his arms around them as he looked down at his toes poking into the sand. ‘Well, first there was this starfish that washed up on the beach, and it started complaining about the weather and why couldn't they ever get the forecast right these days, which to be fair, is perfectly true. They really do never get it quite right, do they? Then there was this seagull that came along, and it wanted to know whether I thought Welsh beaches were nicer than Cornish beaches, only I didn't know. I said I've only ever been here and Llandudno, but I was thinking maybe we should visit Cornwall, so that we can go to the beach and see it for ourselves, so that the next time I get asked, I'll actually be able to have an opinion on the matter.’

Jack knelt down and pressed a hand to Ianto's forehead. ‘Are you feeling okay? You're a little…’ What? Out of his head? Delusional? Having a psychotic break?

‘Found it!’ Gwen cried, jogging up to meet them. She stopped in front of them, leaning over hands on her thoughts as she caught her breath. ‘It was one of those… mind thingies,’ she said, pausing to suck in another lungful of air. ‘You know, the ones that mess with your reality. Managed to get close enough to switch it off before it started making me see pink unicorns and giraffes in ballet tutus.’

Ah, that'll be it, Jack thought. ‘Where was it?’

Gwen pointed a bit further up the beach. Just far enough away to not be able to pick it up on their sensors, but close enough that prolonged exposure would make you a bit gaga. Ianto must have gotten close, but not close enough to detect it, and then carried on in the other direction, but not before getting enough of an exposure to make him a bit doolally.

‘Nice work. I’d give you the credit for finding it, but that award goes to Ianto for finding it first.’ Even if he clearly had no idea about it.

Gwen gave a theatrical sigh. ‘Always the bridesmaid, never the bride, eh?’

Jack grinned. ‘Says the prettiest alien impregnated bride that ever was. Okay, Ianto,’ Jack said, tucking an arm under him and hauling him to his feet. ‘How about we put those shoes and socks back on and we'll go see if we can find a chippie van that'll sell us some nice cod to eat by the seaside?’ The effects were only temporary whilst the device was active. Give it an hour and Ianto should be back to making perfect sense again.

‘Do you think they sell cod and chips on Cornish beaches?’ Ianto asked, letting Jack loop an arm through his to guide him back to the car.

‘I dunno. Maybe we should take a holiday there some time to find out.’

‘That would be good,’ Ianto agreed, still standing there barefoot. ‘Then we'll have a proper comparison.’

‘Those seagulls will never get a better analysis,’ Jack agreed, humouring him. They might have wasted the better part of the morning, but at least Jack would have something to entertain him for the rest of the afternoon. He certainly wouldn't be letting Ianto live this down anytime soon. There had to be some perks to the job.