dandelionblizzard

"I'm sorry, Dennis," Mac mewled, cowering.

Mac is sorry. A sorry excuse for a man.

It's not enough that Mac can't look Dennis in the eye when he's done something wrong, like a kicked puppy. Or that he messes up all the time regardless of how supposedly bad he feels. Only yesterday he forgot to buy low-fat milk and didn't bother compensating by pouring less into Dennis' bedtime tea.

No, all that would never be enough for the ever-theatrical Mac. Yesterday was any old Thursday, whereas today is the last Friday of the month. Perfect setting for the climax of his twisted little story.

Y'know, Dennis gets one cheat day a month, and he's really worked for it this time (he's one notch down on his belt!). He added resistance bands to his morning stretching routine. He threw out all the stupid sugary snack bars Mac tries to force on him when he hasn't eaten for a goddamn hour or so.

Dennis even cut down to twelve beers a day.

And then Mac goes and drops his vanilla bean icecream on the fucking pavement?! Even toddlers can hold onto their icecreams. Even toddlers can look you in the goddamn eye and apologize.

But Dennis doesn't say any of that.

"It's fine, Mac. really. Just buy me another icecream."