Title: Cause of Death
Fandom: Bartimaeus
Rating: PG
Length: 319 words
Content notes: —
Author notes: —
Summary: Nathaniel's prepared for the worst, Bartimaeus is causing trouble and Kitty just wants to enjoy her wedding day.

"What's the holdup?" Bartimaeus asks, squinting up at them with bright yellow eyes.

Kitty tries to smother her laughter behind her hand, which only serves to get Nathaniel visibly flustered. "He thinks there's gonna be an assassination attempt because he's the most melodramatic person I've ever met in my life."

"I resent that," Bartimaeus says, but the cat grins up at her cheerfully. "He's probably right, though," he concedes, "anyone would like to off this git."

Nathaniel turns his glare on Bartimaeus instead. "He's standing right here, you know."

Kitty barely covers her snort, but clearly not well enough, because Nathaniel arches an eyebrow and folds his arms. It looks good on him.

"I mean," Kitty says, scraping the heel of her boot against the marble, "a lot of people would love to get rid of you, you can't possibly deny that."

Nathaniel blows out an exasperated breath and stares at the ceiling as if it contained the solution to his current predicament. "I have no idea why I agreed to marry you."

"Probably because you're a sucker for punishment," Kitty suggests before she can stop herself.

"Can't fucking argue with that," he mutters darkly and takes off, down the hallway, but not before a rather pointed glare in Bartimaeus' direction.

Bartimaeus curls his fuzzy tail around himself and tilts his head. "He really is, you know. Kind of what makes him so much fun."

"I know," Kitty says, knowing she probably looks a bit daft, staring after him with unmistakable fondness. "Take it easy on him. It's his wedding day."

"Alright," Bartimaeus says with a grin unbecoming of a cat.

"And please change your form," Kitty adds, squinting down at him. "His allergies are going haywire already because of all the flowers. If he ends up dying of cat hair by the end of the night when assassination's apparently on the table, I'll be very cross with you."