smallhobbit

Title: A Trip to Tenbury House
Fandom: Keeping Up Appearances [Mods: I suggest f: tv (category)]
Rating: G
Length: 350 words
Summary: Hyacinth has decreed she and Richard will visit Tenbury House
 

Hyacinth had decided that she and Richard would visit Tenbury House and Gardens, because Councillor Mrs Blenkinsop had been the previous week and declared it an excellent place to go for a walk followed by coffee and cake in the little tea room.  Accordingly, Richard had been ordered out of the house at a quarter past nine so that they would be at Tenbury shortly after it opened, and before the general public had arrived.

Richard had pointed out that while the gardens opened at ten, the house itself didn’t open until eleven, but Hyacinth had swept his objections aside, declaring that it would give them time to explore the garden first, and would no doubt provide her with some suitable ideas for what he could do with their own garden; so making it even more suitable for genteel outdoor soirées.

As soon as they entered, Hyacinth set off along the path, calling over her shoulder, “Do keep up, Richard!”

Richard, so accustomed to her instructions that he habitually ignored her, didn’t bother looking in her direction. 

They continued in that fashion, until suddenly Richard shouted, “Hyacinth, look out!”

Hyacinth turned to face him.  “Richard, I will not allow you to address me in that way.  If you wish to draw my attention to something, then approach me, touch my elbow, and say, ‘Could I have a quiet word.’”

As she was speaking, the sprinkler, which had been working its way across the lawn, spun round, and watered not only the patch of grass before it, but also everything which stood on or beside the grass, including Hyacinth.

Hyacinth spluttered and said, “Richard, you could have warned me.”

Richard shrugged his shoulders and muttered to himself, “Well, I did try to.”

As might be expected, the outing was cut short.  As he drove home, Richard wondered what excuse Hyacinth would give Elizabeth to explain why they hadn’t visited the gardens.  He wasn’t surprised when it turned out he’d been feeling a little under the weather, and she had decided it would be better not to risk him catching a chill.