Title: Fender-Bender
Fandom: FAKE
Author: badly_knitted
Characters: Ryo, Dee, OC.
Rating: PG-13
Setting: After the manga.
Summary: All Ryo did was stop at an intersection, but then another car tried to drive right up his exhaust…
Word Count: 798
Content Notes: None needed.
Written For: Challenge 335: Crash.
Disclaimer: I don’t own FAKE, or the characters. They belong to the wonderful Sanami Matoh.




Ryo sat there in a state of shocked disbelief, trying to get his head around what had just occurred. This sort of thing simply didn’t happen; not to him, not after all his police training.

“I can’t believe I crashed! I’ve been driving since I was sixteen and I’ve never been involved on an accident!”

Neither had Dee, but he wasn’t the one behind the wheel, so he was perhaps a little less shaken by the unexpected turn of events.

“Technically you didn’t; it was the jerk behind who crashed into us. Thought he was ridin’ our tailpipe a little too close for comfort.” Which wasn’t that unusual in New York, especially at rush hour. The impact had propelled the two detectives’ unmarked sedan forward several feet, but thankfully not far enough for the vehicle to impede cross-traffic at the intersection, so they weren’t in any danger.

“We better assess the damage and have a few choice words with the dumbass drivin’ the other car.” Dee unclipped his seatbelt and opened the passenger door, sliding out and making his way around the hood. Further back in the now stationary queue, horns were blaring, but everyone would just have to wait for the moment, or manoeuvre around the accident if they were in that much of a rush.

Taking a deep breath, Ryo shut off the engine, took the keys from the ignition, and got out, locking the car up tight behind him, as a precaution against opportunistic thieves. It might be a police vehicle rather than his own car, but that didn’t make him any less responsible for its contents.

The other driver was already out of his car by the time Ryo joined Dee, and was glaring angrily at the two men.

“What the fuck d’you morons think you’re playin’ at, slammin’ your brakes on like that?” His voice sounded a little slurred.

Dee raised an eyebrow. “We didn’t.” Ryo was an excellent driver and had slowed smoothly to a halt. “It’s called stoppin’ at a red light.”

That just made the man even more belligerent. “Think you’re funny, do ya?”

He gestured at the front of his car, jammed up against the rear of Dee and Ryo’s. The radiator grille looked like it was coming adrift, and the hood had popped slightly open from the impact. The trunk of the unmarked sedan was also dented.

“Look what you’ve done to my car!” It was a late model Audi. “You’re gonna pay for this! In fact I’m gonna sue your asses for every cent you’ve got! Thanks to your damned stupidity you’ve probably given me whiplash. You’re gonna be payin’ off my medical bills forever!”

“I doubt that. You rammed us, not the other way around, and have you been drinkin’?”

“What’s that to you?”

“Well, ya sound a little slurred there, is all.” Dee got right up in the other guy’s face and sniffed. “Yep, definitely got alcohol on his breath, and I’m not talkin’ about a beer or two. He’s been at the hard stuff,” he said to Ryo over his shoulder. “Good thing we were ahead of him, otherwise he probably would’ve run the red light and caused a pile-up. As it is, it’s just a minor fender-bender, no serious damage done.”

“Screw that! D’ya know how much this car cost me? I just had it serviced!” The drunk driver went to shove Dee, stumbling and almost falling over when Dee took a couple of steps back.

“Driving while under the influence, that’s a big no-no,” Dee chided. He was enjoying himself.

“Fuck you! Who d’you think you are anyway, the cops?”

“Yep.” Dee grinned wolfishly, holding up his badge. “That would be us, and you’re under arrest.”

“No way!” The idiot actually took a swing at Dee, who sidestepped, grabbed his wrist, and slammed him face down over the hood of his own car. “Oh look, now we’ve got ya on resistin’ arrest too.”

While Dee cuffed the drunk and read him his rights, Ryo ducked back into their car and got on the radio, calling for a tow truck and some traffic cops to sort out the jam caused by the accident. It didn’t take long for two uniformed officers on motorcycles to arrive on scene, and while waiting for more help to reach them they held up cross-traffic just long enough for Dee and Ryo, with the drunk in the backseat of their sedan and cursing loudly, to cross the intersection and continue on their way back to the two-seven. With any luck, their reluctant passenger would lose his licence after this stunt.

Dee grinned across at his partner, who was behind the wheel again. “Instant karma. Don’t ya just love it? Bozo back there’s gonna get exactly what he deserves.”


The End