Fandom: Torchwood

Characters: Jack, Ianto, Gwen 

Author: m_findlow

Rating: PG

Length: 1,018 words

Content notes: none

Author notes: Written for Challenge 333 - Amnesty, Challenge 70 - Resolutions, and badly_knitted's prompt "Torchwood, Jack/Ianto, Leaving earth. Again." at fic_promptly 

Summary: Ianto puts on a brave face, knowing that they've got a job to do. 

'I'll come back,' Jack promised.

It was hard to argue with him when the world was going to hell in a handbasket. It was also hard to think of anything other than how dashing he looked, standing there in his greatcoat, holding what had to be the biggest of all the guns from the Torchwood armoury. Ianto could almost hate how Torchwood had completely changed his perception of what was normal anymore. All he could think was how sexy Jack looked standing there like that and how much of a shame it was that he couldn't just grab Jack and have his way with him right then and there. He'd have had that coat off in a matter of seconds, thinking how nice it would be on the floor between them and the concrete floor. Clothes maketh the man but Ianto liked his man without them just as much.

And then the realisation hit him again. Jack was leaving them to go and help his Doctor. There wasn't time for these teasing thoughts and fantasies. He had to focus and that's what made him start to feel a little bit sick. Jack had left before to see his Doctor and he almost hadn't made it back. They'd talked about it any number of times, Jack describing the year that never was and how his incarceration aboard the Valiant had been torturous and horrible; how all he'd been left to think about was coming home to his team and his lover. He hadn't realised how much Ianto meant to him until he had to suffer in solitude without that reassuring presence at his side.

Talk like that always made Ianto blush, thinking that he was just plain and ordinary - hardly a match for anyone else Jack could choose. What struck Ianto however was what might have happened if Jack hadn't been caught up in an adventure and left them, returning to save Earth from a madman hell bent on wiping out the entire future of the human race. Jack loved the excitement and the rush of adventure and whilst Torchwood provided plenty of that, it wasn't the same.

With Torchwood Jack was in charge, responsible for the lives of everyone. Hitching a ride with the Doctor that was no longer the case. Jack was just a passenger along for the ride, much the same way Ianto was when he tagged along with Jack. Being burdened with the weight of that much responsibility had to be hard, but to suddenly be relieved of it… that felt too tempting for Jack. Perhaps he might not have come back at all that first time if things hadn't panned out the way they had. That was always the thought that nagged at him. What if Jack had never come back? What if he didn't come back this time either? He loved Jack and he knew, even if Jack never said it, that Jack loved Ianto in return. But what if being with the Doctor was so much better than that?

Things were dire right now, but if they succeeded, there was nothing stopping Jack from just taking off like he had done before, off to have more adventures and fun without them. For once it wasn't only himself he was thinking of but Gwen as well. When there'd been four of them they'd only just barely held Torchwood together. Now it was just the two of them. They couldn't do this. They needed Jack and he knew that. They couldn't go on without him.

And Ianto couldn't go on without Jack. Perhaps that was needy and selfish but it was true. And here was Jack readying to leave them and there was so much he hadn't yet said to Jack. There were things that maybe he'd never be brave enough to say, but he knew he'd rue every last unspoken word if this was the last moment they ever had together. He always imagined that when the world was truly ending they'd at least be together when it did. Standing side by side with Jack was the way he wanted to go if indeed he wasn't going to make it. The idea of them being separated was… he hated it.

But he also hated the idea of daleks storming the city and the hub. They couldn't be allowed to infiltrate the hub and its technology. If they did, they might never be stopped. He'd seen what devastation they'd caused at Torchwood One. He wouldn't let Torchwood Three fall the same way, even if that meant he and Jack would have different duties to fulfil. That was the price to be paid. It was their collective duty, the one they'd resolved to hold fast to, their own lives be damned.

He wished he were closer so that he could have kissed Jack and wished him good luck. What he really wanted however was not to wish him luck but rather to pour as much love and emotion into that kiss as possible, to remind Jack of the one reason he should do absolutely everything in his power to come back. And soon.

'I'm coming back,' Jack repeated, as if they didn't believe him for a second.

Gwen gave him a slight nod. 'Don't worry about us. Just go.' She knew as well as Ianto that there was every chance Jack might never come back. They both loved him in their own way, just as it has always been.

Ianto chewed his lip, trying to put on a brave face for all their sakes. Now was not the time to show weakness. He had to be strong. 'We'll be fine.'

Jack gave him a cheeky smile. That single smile made Ianto melt and ache on the inside all at the same time. 'You'd better be.' We will, Ianto vowed. Jack would always survive but Ianto's job now was to survive for Jack. He was leaving. But he was going to come back, for Ianto, for both of them, to bask in the glory of victory and all that it entailed. The world didn't end today.