Title: Death Knight Configuration
Fandom 1: Fire Emblem: Three Houses
Fandom 2: Movie (Category) – Hellraiser
Rating: PG-13
Length: 910 Words
Content Notes: References to violence.
Author Notes: Yes, this is crack. Cracks appear in the text, too.
Summary: Hubert helps the Death Knight call it a day.

* * * *

"I need to procure a specific object," Hubert said, folding his white-gloved hands together, "and I believe you already know which object I mean."

The man in the mask had been sporting his normal cheer, telling Hubert of his new arrivals and his ongoing sales, but that statement made him stop in his tracks, laying his palms flat upon his counter and leaning forward. "That is the one object that I can't sell to you under any circumstances, Sir Hubert, and, if you know anything about it, you understand why."

"I'm aware of the danger." Hubert closed the door to the shop. "That's why I'm talking to you here instead of at your cart in the square. This isn't for me." He smiled a smile that could chill the blood. "It's ... necessary for dealing with a member of Her Majesty's entourage who needs chastising."

"You mean –" The Dark Merchant paused. "Ah, I see. That, I can understand. In that case, you're going to want to be as far from that as you can be before it gets opened, and you'll want to bring it straight back to me once, ah, everything's said and done." He looked to the left, then to the right, as if being watched. "Listen, I know you're not fond of the clergy, but you'd better get that Linhardt boy to sanctify the area afterwards. And don't even think of opening it anywhere near the monastery grounds. Please."

"Duly noted." Hubert nodded, looking down at the object as the Dark Merchant unwrapped it on the counter. "You need only name your price."

"There's no price on this," the man insisted. "I only ask that you bring it back. If you have any idea what this can do in the wrong hands –" He shook his head. "Of all the things the Agarthan civilization created and discovered, this is unquestionably the worst." He added, mumbling to himself, "I'm not sure if we made this or found it. Probably found it."

"Its origin is of no importance to me," Hubert replied, picking up the object – a small, black-and-gold box – and stashing it in a pouch on his belt.

"You know, if you'd saved that little girl, the white-haired one from the Golden Deer House, you wouldn't need that thing." Hubert shot him a sharp look. "I'm just saying, Sir Hubert. She was exceptionally powerful. I don't think she'd have had any issues dealing with ... that person."

"If I had a well to fill with my regrets, Merchant, no one would go thirsty." Hubert shook his head. "Good day. I'll be back with this tomorrow."

As he departed, the Dark Merchant sighed, "I certainly hope so."

----

"You have my thanks, Hubert," Jeritza said, accepting the box. After a moment of silence, he added, "It's a pity I have to let you go on living."

"A pity, indeed." Hubert nodded. "You're certain this is what's best?"

"This is a fate befitting the Death Knight, yes." The tall man looked at their surroundings, the box in his hands. "Here? In the ruins of this chapel?"

"Yes. And, before you ask, I have no intention of staying here to observe fascinating thought the results might be." He dusted off his hands, as if to wash them clean of the artifact. "Goodbye, Jeritza. Death awaits you."

"That it does." As soon as Hubert departed, he started twisting the box in his hands, moving its individual pieces to solve the puzzle by changing it from one cube into another with different symbols on its gold-plated sides.

It took him several minutes, but he realized that he had achieved his solution as soon as the box made a loud click and the temperature in the ruins immediately dropped several degrees, the wind blowing loudly.

A single tear emerged from beneath his mask as the walls and floor around started to crack, light emerging from the resulting fissures as he whispered, his voice lost in the chaos, "I've waited my whole life for this."

And a different, distorted voice answered, "And we've waited for you."

----

Hubert returned the next day to discover the ruins looking as they had before his departure, no sign of any disturbance, save for the discarded box and multiple long-dried blood stains on the floor. He carefully picked up the box and used his handkerchief to painstakingly wipe it down, though it seemed as pristine as it had behind the counter at the shop.

"Oddly enough, you're probably more at peace now than you ever were in life," he mused, and, for a long second, he had the sense that Jeritza was still there, perhaps nodding in agreement, though the feeling vanished.

He left the ruins, his footsteps echoing as he gestured to Linhardt and his entourage of mages to cleanse the area of any remaining black magic.

END.