Title: The Fulcrum of His Life
Fandom: Hawaii Five-0 (2010)
Characters/Pairing: Steve McGarrett/Danny Williams
Rating: R (explained in the content notes)
Length: 1089 words
Content notes: Discussion of and references to canon-typical violence, including terrorism, hostage situations, shootings, and murder. Also, the things these two are willing to do for each other could read as codependency.
Author notes: Written for the fan_flashworks Challenge #180 lever. Set after 7.08, recently established relationship between the pairing.  Possible sequel to my story "Picking a Different Base," but it can be read independently.
Summary: In just a few minutes of speaking to him, the terrorist was able to pinpoint Steve's weak spot and gain leverage over him.

The realization hits him a few nights after the hostage incident at the winter formal.

That night, Steve had been primarily focused on the strange words Danny used, how he had repeated the words "call" and "will." The team had been able to use Danny's coded message to contact Will, Lou's son, who was some place safe and could tell them how many terrorists were there so that Five-0 could stage a rescue.

But now he recalls that the terrorist had threatened to shoot Danny first once he got back on the phone with Steve. In just a few minutes of speaking to him, the terrorist was able to pinpoint Steve's weak spot and gain leverage over him.

Steve tightens his hold on Danny and stares at the ceiling fan spinning overhead.

Danny and his children are the fulcrum around which Steve's life pivots. He doesn't mind if Danny knows that, after he took the opportunity to pick another base and kiss Danny once they were home alone. He doesn't mind the fact that his ohana knows and has known for some time since they won't utilize it for anything but lighthearted, good-natured teasing.

But he is honestly terrified of the criminals they deal with every day knowing and horrified at the notion that someday his love for Danny, Grace, and Charlie could lead to their demise.

Steve must have been holding Danny too tightly, because he makes a displeased noise and shifts to sit up a little, blocking Steve's view of the ceiling fan.

"You're gonna burn a hole in the ceiling if you keep staring at it, babe."

Steve is too lost in his fears to even laugh at the joke.

Danny sighs. "And now we're doing aneurysm face. Awesome. Are you gonna tell me what's wrong?"

Steve shakes his head. "I don't even know where to start."

"Just start anywhere." He sinks back next to Steve in his previous position with his head resting on Steve's chest. "I've got to tell you, this role reversal is making me uncomfortable. I'm supposed to be the insomniac in this relationship."

That manages to pull a weak chuckle from Steve. He gazes down at Danny, who is staring up at him stubbornly and expectantly. Steve won't be able to get out of this without explaining his insomnia to Danny.

"He knew," Steve begins.

"Who knew?"

"That terrorist, right after your coded 'call Will' message. He told me you were going to die first."

He can feel Danny let out a shaky breath after he's reminded of the incident at the winter formal. "And?"

Steve sighs. "And? That terrorist knew exactly what to say to scare the life out of me after talking to me for less than five minutes."

"Steve--"

"I think he knew how I felt about you."

"I'm pretty sure he just knew I was Five-0, or your partner, at most. There's no way he could have known. I didn't even know."

"I'm pretty sure Chin, Kono, and Lou have known for years. Grace didn't act surprised at all when you told her we were together. Even your own mother knew. And then there's all the people we've run into over the years who thought we were married."

"Most of those were jokes, babe."

"Not all of them." Steve vividly remembers Ruth and that college girl who thought they were her friend Kelly's dads.

Danny huffs out an exasperated breath, but he doesn't argue the point. "What are you getting at, Steve?"

"Now that we're together, everyone's going to know, even more than they did before. Including bad guys who will try to use it against me. I have a lot of enemies, Danny, and not just as the head of Five-0. All of those years as a Navy SEAL mean that there are probably other guys like Nick Taylor running around."

Danny sits up. He looks offended and annoyed. "Are you trying to break up with me before we ever really get a chance?"

Steve sits up, too. "No, Danny, that's not..." He sighs. It probably would be safer for Steve to break up with Danny, but he's too selfish and too in love to let Danny go like that. And, of course, Danny would vehemently protest anyone making decisions for him without his consent.

He stares down at his lap. He can't look at Danny right now. He feels too ashamed and too vulnerable. "What if that guy did shoot you, Danny? Or what if it was Grace, or Charlie?" The tears that he has been holding back since this conversation began start to stream down his face, as he imagines one of them being murdered right in front of him. "If you or one of your kids died because of me, I don't think I'd be able to live with myself."

Danny pulls Steve into his arms and lets him cry against the juncture of his neck and shoulder for a few seconds. "You know who I blamed when my ex-partner kidnapped Grace? Besides myself, of course, because apparently we're a matching pair of idiots."

Steve gives a wet laugh at that.

"I mostly blamed him for being a psychotic jackass. And I shot him in the knee. If, God forbid, something bad should happen to one of my kids again, I would blame the psychotic jackass, not you."

"Even if--"

"Yes, even in the convoluted scenario you imagined. And, for the record, if someone killed you, or Grace, or Charlie, I would hunt them down and end their pathetic, miserable life."

Steve swallows. "If I wasn't the dead one, I would help you. And I'd do the same for you."

Danny moves out of the embrace and gives Steve a weak, watery smile. "I know." He lays a soft kiss on Steve's lips before he guides them to lay in the positions they were in before. His arm is curved over Steve's waist. "I can't believe this is me saying this, but you've got to stop thinking about horrible stuff like this, babe."

"Danny Williams telling me to stop worrying? I never thought I'd see the day."

"I didn't either. Just try to get some sleep, okay?"

Steve nods and attempts to reassure himself by holding Danny as close as he can, but neither he nor Danny are able to fall asleep for a very long time after their harrowing conversation. Steve stares at the blades of the ceiling fan rotating in the air until the hypnotic motion finally lulls him into rest.